Dentist.

A guy and a girl met at a bar. They got along so well that they decided to go to the girl's place.

A few drinks later, the guy took off his shirt and then washed his hands. He then took off his trousers, and washed his hands again.

The girl had been watching him and said, "You must be a dentist."

The guy, surprised, said, "Yes, how did you figure that out?"

"Easy," she replied, "you keep washing your hands." One thing led to another, and they made love.

Afterward, the girl said, "You must be a good dentist."

The guy, now with a boosted ego, said, "Sure, I'm a good dentist, how did you figure that out?"


"I didn't feel a thing!"

Pest Control

A woman was having a passionate affair with an inspector from a pest-control company. One afternoon they were carrying on in the bedroom together when her husband arrived home unexpectedly.

"Quick," said the woman to her lover, "into the closet!" and she pushed him in the closet, with nothing on!

The husband, however, became suspicious and after a search of the bedroom discovered the man in the closet.

"Who are you?" he asked him.

"I'm an inspector from Bugs-B-Gone," said the exterminator.

"What are you doing in there?" the husband asked."I'm investigating a complaint about an infestation of moths," the man replied.

"And where are your clothes?" asked the husband

The man looked down at himself and said... "Those little b@$%@s!"

Senility

An elderly man went to his doctor and said,

"Doc, I think I'm getting senile. Several times lately, I have forgotten to zip up."

"That's not senility," replied the doctor.

"Senility is when you forget to zip down."

Memory Loss?

An elderly man goes into a house of ill repute and tells the madam he would like a young girl for the night. Surprised, she looks at the ancient man and asks how old he is.

"I'm 90 years old," he says.

"90!" replies the woman.

"Don't you realize you've had it?"

"Oh, sorry," says the old man.

"How much do I owe you?"

CONFESSION

An elderly man walks into a confessional.
The following conversation ensues:

Man: "I am 92 years old, have a wonderful wife of 70 years, many children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Yesterday, I picked up two college girls, hitchhiking. We went to a motel, where I slept with each of them three times."

Priest: "Are you sorry for your sins?"

Man: "What sins?"

Priest: "What kind of a Catholic are you?"

Man: "I'm Jewish."

Priest: "Why are you telling me all this?"

Man: "I'm telling everybody!"